MY THOUGHTS ON SUNDAY with CHARLES CHISALA

A READER called me a few days ago and asked me to write about showy commuters and other travellers who have the habit of talking loudly on the phone while travelling on public transport without caring about the feelings and rights of the other passengers.
I am sure you have also travelled with such uncultured and backward passengers, who know nothing about public place etiquette.

The reader narrated how a minibus she was travelling on recently in Lusaka from the city centre to one of the townships picked up a woman on one of the numerous stops that dot the route. As soon as the woman got on the bus, the reader recounted, all hell broke loose.

“Charles, can’t you write about these people who broadcast their personal affairs while on public buses without any regard for the other passengers? It’s just too much! Why are some people not ashamed to disturb the peace of the other passengers, who are total strangers, by talking loudly on their mobile phones for long periods?” she complained.

“Immediately this woman got on the bus she started dialling one number after the other. She managed to get through to one of the numbers and started talking with the other person at the other end of the line at the top of her voice, shouting and laughing all the way from Kamwala to Chilenje South. I was very disappointed with that woman because she kept talking even when it was clear that most of the other passengers were angry with her,” she said.

The reader said several passengers looked at her angrily to express their displeasure, but the caller was not bothered. One would have expected her to read the facial expressions of her fellow passengers, but she didn’t care.

One young man who was unfortunate enough to sit next to her grimaced, frowned, grunted, snorted, fidgeted and even clucked his tongue in a futile attempt to help the woman realise that she was being a nuisance to the other passengers, but she just kept yapping, non-stop.

First she asked the other person how she was, then changed the topic to groundnuts, pumpkins, cassava and God knows what. When she ran out of farm produce to talk about she started gossiping about another woman and her husband.

Unfortunately, there was no-one courageous enough on the bus to challenge her. All the other passengers could do was look at each other, glare at the talker, murmur and pout.

Someone should have boldly told the uncultured woman that she is an ifontini or umututu. Who was interested in her cheap banter?

I remember one incident when I was forced to use public transport because I did not have fuel in my personal motor vehicle. I boarded this minibus at Melisa shopping complex in Kabulonga going back to the city centre.

There was this young man who kept making one call after the other talking and laughing as if he was the only passenger on the bus. And no-one was courageous enough to intervene except frown and murmur.
When we reached the Longacres bus stop, the bus stopped to allow some passengers to disembark and pick up others. All the while the bus was stationary the boy kept talking. By the time it started off again he was still shouting and laughing into his handset.

At Hotel Intercontinental I was so annoyed that I could no longer remain silent. The fool was seated just a seat ahead of me and I couldn’t just allow him to continue assaulting our ears.

“Bakalamba, I think we have had enough of this nonsense. You can’t be shouting all the way from Melisa without any respect for the other passengers. Can you call your friends or whoever you are talking with after you have left the bus?
“If you continue I will have no choice but to confiscate your phone and only give it back to you when you leave this bus.”

Several voices spoke out in support of me. Even the conductor who had kept quiet despite complaints from passengers about the exhibitionist caller joined the chorus.

“Kwati pali ka foni balelangisha (what a cheap phone to show off),” he quipped triggering a cacophony of contemptuous laughter across the entire bus. “Someone must have donated it to him,” I rubbed it in, and there were more sniggers as people looked at me gratefully.
The twit turned to look at the person who had just spoken and was about to mouth something silly, but froze when he saw my posture and physical build. I was ready to take him on. After all I had the support of all the other passengers and the crew.

But for the rest of the journey he just kept quiet, sulking.

I needed not remind that unmannered chongololo that in all the years I was a police detective I was a respected karamoja sprinter and purple belt holding Taekwondo karateka. I still have those skills and am ready to use them whenever necessary. He therefore did a wise thing to keep quiet because I was ready to kick and punch the bad habit out of him.

Another reader told me she is a cross-border trader based in Lusaka. She complained that every time she boards a bus at Nakonde on her way to Dar es Salaam there is a male trader from Ndola’s Masala market who talks like a machine. I have withheld his name but I am sure those who have travelled with him know the person I am talking about.

She said the man will talk all the way until he falls asleep, and when he wakes up he resumes the non-stop talking until he falls asleep again.

“The man is such an embarrassment,” the sister complained. “He will tell everybody how much money he is carrying, how much he has in the bank, how much he has left with his wife at home, what words he spoke to her when giving her the money and the latest household property he has bought.”

The sister said at first the other passengers used to just laugh at this talkative man, but he has now become a big nuisance.

Please, my fellow Zambians let us not make fools of ourselves by talking loudly on our mobile phones while in public places such as funerals or public buses. No one is interested in knowing your private affairs.
If you are travelling on a public bus and you want to make an important call make it short. Equally, if you receive a call and feel compelled to answer it, be brief.

But to some primitive people it is an opportunity to let all and sundry know what the call is all about without realising that they are actually being a nuisance. Don’t you people know that the people on that bus have different reasons for travelling?
Some of them are going for funerals of their loved ones, some for job interviews while others are going for weddings. So they are in different states of their minds and need peace so that they can introspect on their respective missions.

Who are you to disturb your fellow passengers with your silly phone conversations? Let me hear you again!

Comments to: chisalaeteman@yahoo.com or cchisala@daily-mail.co.zm

Vendors at the side of a bus in Livingstone, Zambia

Little Andatu, with big round eyes… Aaah! (photo: Indonesian Ministry of Forestry/AFP)